I WON'T BE HEMMING

Sometimes I need to walk

To feel the city breathe

Late at night

Watching traffic whiz by

The dark irony

Of life

It’s the homeless

Who go to bed early

Up curly with the sun

Now blanketed

Drunk & doomed

Under the watchful eye

Of the moon

 

That place where the old

Wells Fargo ATM used to be

The Staples business refuge

For the wind, biting hard

The night skies beauty at large

While my feet ache from

Another long day

So long have I stray’d

Losing sight of the city

Sometimes I need to feel

My life walking home

I pray

 

Walking home alone

The cold

It’s real

Letting the city

Breathe me in

Learning to put love

And myself in the same sentence

Putting up with sin

 

Needed to get out

Of myself tonight

Wanted to fill the void within

Watching your aged legs

Spill out of your dress

Splashing over your chair

Like a hunter I

Smell lust

It’s right there

With the color in your hair

 

Plus I slept way too long today

Amped up and charged

Into you like a barge

I push

You pull

Eyes closed

Like vampires

Biting

We thirst

My bedroom

The great hearse

 

Splashing dance floor

Winded brown & soft

Yet, suddenly I’m lost

In missing my own lover

Like waking up with no covers

Cold, now curious

Fantasy expires

Desire is gone

Like a balloon pop

Instant drop

Stop & roll

And just walk the fuck away

Needed to get out

Of myself today

 

Walking home to feel the streets

The city I breathe, within

Pasta boat stuck on TV

Outside CNN

Glued to the way

The world looks this way

Passing the places

Where she walks

The zone; I used to call it

I guess now it’s

Just down the block

Whatever & however

Were all black birds

To a flock, the mother

Of tick & time she tocks

My desires stock, crumbles

Like the dirt beneath these

Shovel’s heaves, the winters

Tree’s, leave

Barren & skinny

Just fingers to the sky

Pointing out the places

Where I used to get high

This void inside, just needs

To be home, no death match

No throne, the garden tonight

I thought I needed

But instead, I just needed to feel

The dead, of winter

And the city breathing

Cold concrete

Beneath my feet

No harm no foul

I’m going home where it’s safe

And sound, where I

Can’t & won’t hurt you

 

Where the sky stays so blue

A place where the void

She can rest in fleece

And I can whisper feelings away

I guess this is showing up

I guess this is growing astray

Noticing the times

I reach outside of myself

For an answer I can

Only find in Him

The one meaning of life

Within

Begin

Overwhelmed

With questions

I stop & settle in

 

Don’t need to answer anything

Tonight, just some warm clothes

& my bed, I guess instead

I just needed to feel the din

I just needed I guess

To let the city win

Like a tiny rip at the seams

I won’t be hemming

I’ll leave it there for show

Tonight outside with the streetlights

I guess I just needed to see them glow

To stretch, to reach

To allow myself to grow