IGNORANT FALLING

Looking over at you

With the silhouette

Of a movie star

Sitting in the movie’s

With my 3-D star

Three weeks singing

So far

Been a goner since

The second you stepped

Out of that yellow

Flagged taxi-cab

You know what I love

About you and I

We just happened

Like burning flames in the sky

Explosions from nowhere

Evolution everywhere

And we just smooth scars

We can sit still

We can sit far

But no matter

What happens today

We just are

I woke up this morning

Realizing you were everywhere

The rains are here again

And you are the sky

The coffee in my mug

You are in my mud

Last night you asked

If you could be my guest

Dominican Republic, the best

Just the way you think alone

I think were in the zone

Baby and I want to fall

I have no parachute

No rip-cord

I hope you don’t mind

If I just eject the front door

Of my mind

Let it all decompress

Letting loose articles

To fly free

And escape the atmosphere

As my hair and jewelry

Just tug at the pressure

As we both step closer

To the edge

Smiling so ignorant

Falling so dumb

Halfway leaning

Out of this airplane

Door

So many thousands of

Feet in the air

THE SKY AND THE LAND

Taking us to that place

To watch souls disappear

Like you said

Something I needed you to see

A place to repent

And place to be free

The sweats

My sacred tented

Dome sleepless

And alone

But now it is you

Whose head I cradle

So rich a

Ladle full of cream

Pouring this love

Over the mountains

And hills, in my dreams

Swimming the darkness

Everything flies away

Just your hand in mine

As the sweat chases

These scars away

Running them across the street

Epidermis peel

This heat making

Us heal

From sickness

And strife

Replenishing

This delicate crystal

Glass of life

With thick

Pure warrior

Blue blood

I put on these red boxing gloves

And take another bow towards love

For I have not seen you for years

In fact with these new eyes

And these new ears

I have never seen you

Quite like this at all

Wasn’t it just the Fall

Where I was praying to be born

And now the first day of Winter

The longest night of the year

Stretching romantic shears

To toss and tumble

In these leaves

Rolling around these black seas

Of sheets and lips

Fingers

And hips

And touching

Your breathe

My neck, you jump

I call

Together we

Fall into the

Darkness

Blending our lines

So the future

We make our own colors

Blurring our clothes

Let the things

That don’t work between

Us slide off the wing

Of the plane

This newest game plan

The sky and the land

I have waited for this night

Target practice for years

Finally an equal in sight

And sound

Loving you on the ground

Rolling around in bed

Or was it the living room

Or the car

Suddenly the ceilings ajar-

Take it slow baby

For I have no where to rush

Fingers in your mouth

To hush you

Waking in and out

Of consciousness

Of dreamscapes

And movie scenes

Falling into your neck line

The glass of water

On the nightstand

Floats in the air

Rolling over to Colorado

The map just changes

Shapes at my feet

Cities below my back

Alarm clock melting

As we wake up on the ceiling

Feet hanging over the door

Lamp shades, ceiling trim

The bed down on the ground

I think were floating in some space

You warm hands on my back

The smell of your hair

Puts me back under

Where I want to be

As my world just spins

Like some slow circus wheel

In one big tumble

Upside down

DEEP UNDER THE SEA

Walking again-
Seems like we just keep
Holding and talking
Eyes and hands like stone
Somehow
Somewhere alone
Some pitchfork in the road
Aimed us together
Someone from above
Sent us this weather
And so together again
When the sky turned to black
You came back
To breath
To love
Teaching me now

In the physical form
The most beautiful thing
I might have just ever seen
Eyes like the Grand Canyon
Delicate ears
Perfect posture
Perfect sheen
Dancing like a queen
We walk for hours yet
Never seem to get far
Too far from our zone
Domestic Cancer
Keeping protected
We stay close to home

My feet dance and my heart
Beats, but its just my eyes
That meet
Yours and truly
I would do anything
In this moment

There’s a fire burning inside
That I just don’t care
About running-
Or hiding-
Or acting or retracting
I just want to make a shelter
On the hill
And keep you safe tonight
I’ll light the fire
And keep the light
Just teach me how to love again

Show me how
Shine even brighter
Burning eyes like a fighter
And my love I challenge
You so
I take your hand slow
And whisper words to myself
That you are just not ready
To hear yet

Watching your pig tails
At your side
I am trying so dam hard
Not to look down at your thighs
But like a garbage disposal
Darling I want to destroy you
In the most loving way
Moving furniture around
The room
In the distance I can hear the boom
Of you and I creating
Something powerful
Some enigma of love
An entire ocean of white doves
Floating for the sunrise

While it's deep under the sea

We are headed

For everything that is mine
I ask for no mercy this time
For there has never been something
Quite like this
For I have never been as centered as
I am today
I am okay
I am willing
And ready
And loving
And steady

You have become my equal
And it is you that you see in me
Nothing else can free me
As does your loving key
So show no mercy for me
Even when I’m down on my knees

For nothing can hurt us
Not another 1000 nights alone
Even as the humming gets louder
This vibration pulls
Just take my hand little one
Looking straight into you
As we just keep swimming
Through this force field

I WAS INVISIBLE

Higher frequency all day

Higher frequently

There is no other way

To lift myself out of bed

Just to hit my knees

I plead with thanksgiving

And gratitude

This plentitude of opportunities

Overwhelms me when I think

Of everything at once

So it is in prayer

That I just see you

Getting ready mentally

To let you into this home

The cobwebs have overgrown

And now I must make the changes

My father once told me of

The way a woman checks the nest

Leaves her scent

Where she stops to rest

For the night

Oh my tap water

I worry

Through December there is no hurry

For this is my time of the year

I attract what I need

And only that may stay

Circling like a cyclone

My whole world

I built alone

With you god

Revving like an engine

Strong centered and focused

Still alone jumping like

A thousand locusts

I devour the future

Loving the suture’s of life

And my scars, so many lessons

Everything I once loved

Has brought me forward

Making the pages I am today

Freeing the man I appear

Before your eyes

Like a prayer I was invisible

Then the rains came

And you fell from the sky

Through my fingers

And through my eyes

Pushing forward this inertia

Of faith and love

No need to beg, borrow

Or steal

For this life is my meal

And I eat so well

My sister told me yesterday

That I have saved enough

Young girls

It’s time for teacher-teacher

So preacher-preacher

Send me a teacher

Someone I can spill this goblet

Of energy with

Someone to slip in

This abundance

A strong god centered woman

I can take my perfect circle

And make a perfect circle

For I am whole, perfect and complete

On my own

But boy we sure do

Smash together well

Like well done mash potato’s

I want to gum drop

Your little hand in mine

Speed off, get lost in time

Lets take a long flight

Take a long swim

Lets jump some continents

The whole world to play

Sit together on the mountain

And just pray

My ego wants to talk

But with love I say shush

For no reason to push

For I am not in control

I surrender my self with

With adaptability

And flexibility to reveal

As the snow falls in Idaho

Just know that it falls in

My mind as well

And only time

She can always tell

This plentitude of opportunities

Overwhelms me when I think

Of everything at once

So it is in prayer

That I just see you

SEAT BELTS IN THE NIGHT

I just know there is something

Special about the way we treat

Each other when were left

To ourselves

Just us alone

And your white shelves

Your soft satin gloves

Stay folded, perfectly wrapped

In white cord to the walls

My toothbrush waits so patient

Jumping on your bed

Like a child

We squeeze and hold so tight

Like seat belts in the night

You demand that I roll

Over when you do

I never chose this path with you

I never even chose you

But something inside of me

Has this pull

This rudimentary lull

The way your skin taste

Like water

And you hair is the air

And I let my hands surf

The wind

Out the window

On the freeway

I stay spaced out

And glazed

Sometimes taking days

Just to think about

How much stuff we

Really could do together

If there was someway

To hold this fragile flame

Through this November rain

To be the picture

And the frame

But deep down

I know sometimes

It’s cities that pass us

And days when you

Don’t even say my name

Sometimes I think

I’m crazy and this is all in my head

You act so surprised

When you hear it

You’re like what and how

And I’m like here and now

And together we both pretend

That this isn’t real

But deep down

I remember

The way I used to be

The lovers

That I refused to see

The ones

That were, just too real

When I wasn’t ready

And so beautifully distracted

Like glass being compacted

We shatter and crumble

Every time you leave town

And so the cycle begins again

We start over as friends

You talk to me even further than

Before, holding these hoops

I must jump through

Then the kisses and then the hugs

The strength of the drugs

Oh they’re just too good to say no

Then suddenly

I wake up

Startled

In the middle of the night

And I’m there

And you’re here

And were together

And nothing else matters

And the world stops

And my toes wiggle

I just lean in closer

All I can feel

Is your warm

Soft brown skin

You take a breath

And your hand finds mine

Encloses and then time

Just stops

I can’t remember anything

And I close my eyes

THE WAY YOU SAY MY NAME

And so it’s through this phone

That I hear you, distant

So far you sound

Saying my name like

A total stranger

Like we never made love

Like we never felt anger

When we didn’t get our way

With each other

Just like we never woke up

So many times before

Like I never saw

Your silhouette in the door

Walking back to sleep

From the bathroom

Finding your side of the bed

Find another reason

To rest my head

Against yours

So many times to you

Have I crawled

You know it takes guts

To call you

In the middle of the night

It takes courage

To hold you

With all my might

In the black

In the light

I guess you just don’t see me

The way I see you

The way I see through

The clear plastic glaze

Glazed over your mask

Glazed over your cocktail flask

Dancing through the night

Coming home to nothing

A hollow shell of an existence

Somehow hoping

To believe these words I spill

To get over you sooner

This rollercoaster shrill

Now just a tired moan

I moan at the moon

It’s shown

My way home

And it’s just sad tonight

Holding this phone

Listening to a voice

I don’t recognize

Speaking words

Feeling things

I just don’t want to feel

You say my name like a stranger

And it’s hard to bite the anger

Into my own phone

Your face in my head

But your voice so far

And it hurts

To know

That so many miles away

You really are

Just so far

So far away

AND SULK AND SLUMBER

I think I was reaching

For the vegan spring rolls

When I said it

“She’s a prostitute man”

Eyes aimed down

Old school-frown

I have to smirk

And grin

Cause if I don’t

I just might break into

Tears

Three years of fears

Closing in on me

Close to using I ask

Myself before he can

How much more of this

Can I with stand

Before my disease

Gets the upper hand

And sends me back

To front row land

Start throwing sand

In the air

No sand castles

Just plumes of dirt and dust

Fucking boundaries

Between lust and love

Lost in the middle

Of a thrust and a shove

Working so hard on so many levels

Of my life

Yet it’s you in the night

Who I want to be next to

The woman I have known for years

All the tears from the world

Splatter, splash and smear

And run off the umbrella

You cover me near

Never needing to grow

I can just sow

And sulk

And slumber

A whole year of December

In your arms

This winter barn

Miracle charm

Only been since Friday

And already I miss your arms

Your hips at my side

Those little waking eyes

In the morning

Asking me how do I feel

Man, I’ll tell you how I feel

Alone and deserted

Spiritually alerted

That I deserve to love myself

The way I have been trained

Knowing and accepting

That the best for me is beyond

This tiny rock of solitude

That I keep choosing

To stay afoot

So let’s just say a foot

Or two closer

Is just maybe a little too

Close for you and me

Because when you’re in the room

My whole world goes boom

And then it’s gone

It’s just me and you and your thong

And all I want is between those thighs

South American eyes

When you run your fingers

Through my hair and rub my ears

I might as well be five years

Old and full of preschool tears

The way mommy used to put me down

That’s the way I feel when

I come home and you’re around

But you see

I came home tonight

You see

And your no where to be found

Probably a few drinks down

A couple pills and a little town

Thousands of miles

Stretched between you and me

And money, and years, and men

Clients and gears

Shifting, paths drifting

Away, further

We stray

I am saddened to say

That when one door closes

Another one opens

Cause here’s hoping

That this new season

Gives me the joy and the reason

To jump out of my little black box

This small little chicken pox

Of a room I keep walking into

Not the body or the hair

The right words

The perfect stare

I want the woman who won’t let go

The woman who can’t say no

To integrity, self respect

Never expecting a check

For something that she didn’t feel

Completely right about

So let me do my own about face

So let me do my own without a trace

Just skip up and out of place

Learned enough

But now clear

The only game I’m playing

Is Truth or Dare

With loving eyes you share

And I no longer need to use

Even when I want to

Cause I already learned

A new way to live

There’s never a reason

To back peddle and skiv

Along the shores of the past

Cause like the tattoos

On my forearms

Today I bear the arms

Of a man who’s walked through flames

I walked through fire

And I walked through

Pain, and even though

I miss my Street Fame

That shit’s changed

And I’ll never be the fucking same

And even through this rough patch

Of briar’s brush

I refuse to keep these wounds a hush

Cause I know it’s the secrets

That’ll take me down

So I tell you what

I’m going through

I share this pain with you again

So I can dip this soft green spring roll

And look you in the eyes

And tell you man, yes I have stepped

Aside, that man, I’m using again

And this time is hurts

She’s been gone for five days

And I’m going through with drawls

My heroin

My heroine

Man I’m going through with drawls

And I don’t like this space

Like the 405 any time of day

This game I just don’t want to play

I want to feel the love that I deserve

I want to be the man that I insure

Every time I kneel down on my knees

And pray

Every day when I bless myself this way

Please god I am asking you tonight

Please give me the courage

And the strength to make it through

Another night

Alone

Cause I don’t want to use

I don’t want to pick up

Whether it’s a pipe

Or whether it’s you

Cause just like your job

Pays you

Man, I sure pay the price

Every time I spend the night

Laying in bed next to you

It just hurts to be without you

Like sugar to a diabetic

Thirty six days without you is hectic

And then add on to the fact

That you’re just the same

As new comers and prostitutes

Small cities, small parachutes

Might as well jump off a barstool

And try and fly

They way I limit myself

With these lies

Why not pick a bigger cliff

Why not pick a brighter sky

Why not pick anything

Besides just getting high

Shape shifting

And face lifting

What in the world am I thinking

I am just barely learning

To love myself

Let alone

Trust in this wealth

That now surrounds me

In every angle of the room

The perfect job

The perfect gloom

Figure and health

Long hair and bedroom eyes

Now if I can just

Get out of my own way

I think I feel some new character

Emerging and trying

To fill this empty room

No need to wait

For the next rainy day in June

I think I’ll just stop, center myself

Sit here and bloom